Destroy all Humans!
The first casualty of war is always truth. Or Bessie, the cow. And you KNEW it, didn’t you? They are real, they are evil and they are here to take over our planet. No, not cows, aliens. Yes, that’s right, the invasion of Earth has already begun, the aliens are among us! Well, one alien to be precise: Crypto 137, Warrior of the Furon Empire, has arrived to save his people by … uhm … extracting DNA from brains. Yours for example. Naturally, one can’t properly subdue inferior life forms without the extensive use of the Zap-O-Matic, the Disintegrator Ray and the notorious Anal Probe Gun. And if that ain’t enough, Crypto can always level everything he sees with his UFO’s heavy loadout.